COLLEGE FOOTBALL TOP 25

No. School (Record) Comment

1. Stanford (27-1) San Diego Zoo/Regional rules: Do not feed No. 16 seeds to animals.

2. Michigan State (24-3) Pumping iron until Big Ten tournament starts.

3. Duke (26-4) With Boozer out, roster stripped to only eight McDonald’s All-Americans.

4. Illinois (23-6) Save Dick Butkus a seat for probable Big Ten final showdown against Michigan State.

5. Florida (22-5) Buckingham Palace doesn’t have guards this good.

6. North Carolina (23-5) In trouble if football team asks for two players back.

7. Iowa State (25-4) Cyclones playing more like a funnel cloud down the stretch.

8. Arizona (21-7) Can’t imagine what Loren Woods is going to say/do next.

9. Kansas (23-5) Jayhawks good again now that Gooden is back.

10. Boston College (23-4) Have a Big East tournament cup of chowda and relax until Friday.

11. Maryland (20-9) Wow. Who spiked the crab cakes and got this team going?

12. UCLA (20-7) Kapono told book title “Just Throw Me the Damn Ball” already taken.

13. Virginia (20-7) 25th anniversary of Cavaliers’ first--and only--ACC championship.

14. Mississippi (23-6) Picked to finish last in SEC West. Guess who finished first?

15. Kentucky (19-9) Thought of Pitino at Louisville has fans madder than hick.

16. Oklahoma (23-6) Sooners 2-0 since coach gave J.R. Raymond the boot.

17. Syracuse (23-7) Most wins in NCAA tournament, 39, without winning it.

18. Texas (23-7) Longhorns are five-alarm hot entering Big 12 tournament.

19. St. Joseph’s (24-5) Edith Bunker sings, “Gee, that ol’ La Salle played great.”

20. Fresno State (24-5) “Felons? We thought you asked if we had any ‘fellas’ on the roster.”

21. Notre Dame (19-8) Brey taking team where no man has since Digger.

22. Ohio State (20-9) Seven consecutive conference wins; so how’s the football team look?

23. Indiana (19-11) Hmmm, 19 victories, and not a chair tossed all season.

24. Wake Forest (19-9) Coach calls local HMO provider and orders a dose of confidence.

25. UC Irvine (24-3) Edged out in best nickname contest by UC Santa Cruz Banana Slugs.